My daughter has gone home. I'm tired and pissed/depressed. My mother has been yelling at me all day. Don't ask. Not like anyone would. I've been dying to cut. I've been wanting to kill myself. I've cried and I want to cry some more. I'm fat and I feel disgusting. I weigh 121. I gained 6 pounds in 2 days. Is that possible? Apparently so. I'm going to have to really restrict to get back down to 115. Although I'm pretty sure laxatives would do wonders. I don't have any though. PM diet pill tonight and tomorrow night and Tuesday I'll start the AM ones. Hopefully I can get everything back on track. Not feeling optimistic or anything. I'm mostly too tired. And yeah... Not in the mood to talk/type/write... So to answer a question:
Chubby bunny is a game. Everyone takes turns saying "chubby bunny" and after the person says it, they put one of the big marshmallows in their mouth. And then everyone keeps saying chubby bunny and putting marshmallows in their mouths and when a person can't clearly say chubby bunny they lose. The person who lasts the longest wins. And the marshmallows start getting all gooey and squishy in your mouth and you start drooling and it's gross. You aren't allowed to chew the marshmallows or tear them into pieces to make them fit better either. That's about the best I can explain it. If you want to know more just google the words chubby bunny and there should be several websites with the rules and such.
~Kes
Please be safe dear.
ReplyDeleteLaxative work wonders. I don't recommend them because I personally am addicted to them.. but they do help you lose like a pound over night if you're blocked up and ABSOFUCKINGLUTELY need to lose weight ;)
ReplyDeletethis is a really really personal question- but then again thats what these blogs are: personal.
ReplyDeletewhy doesn't your daughter live with you? do you miss her when she's not with you? I worry about my eating habits being picked up if\when I have kids... is that a concern of yours?
if its too much feel free to ignore me, I'm a tad rude.
When my family friend commited suicide, my dad told my older sister "It's never that bad". I was offended because he didn't tell ME that. I thought to myself "Jesus Christ, Dad doesn't know us at all--he doens't even know which daughter needs the advice the most".
ReplyDeleteSo I'll tell you it too. "It's never that bad". Yeah, it's a fucking piss off hearing it. It sounds ignornant. It sounds stupid. But sometimes it's all I need to keep a day from going bad.
-THAT girl who
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