Monday, May 9, 2011

It's after 2 and all I've had that has calories is gum.  I don't count calories from sugar-free gum though.  I probably burn off the cals chewing it.  And now I've got some green tea brewing.  I bought 3 boxes of tea.  A box of mixed berry green tea, a box of white mangosteen and peach green tea, and a box of black tea with carmel.  I was in need of some good tea.  I just had some caffeine free teas that are supposed to make you sleepy.  Not the best thing to drink in the middle of the day.  I'm going to avoid eating until supper.  Completely doable.  I just have to keep myself occupied and chewing gum or drinking something 0 cal.  I've probably burned off 200 cal from exercise and walking around stores.  I couldn't find any jeans that were cheap enough for me.  I don't want to pay $20+ on one pair of jeans just to lose weight and have them not fit 2 months later.  And that's about all I could find.  I found leggings and jeggings and skinny jeans.  I do not wear leggings or jeggings and I am not skinny enough currently to look decent in skinny jeans.  I have nothing against leggings and jeggings but I don't want to wear pants with elastic waists and things so form fitting that ill show off all of my lumps and bumps and such.  And skinny jeans do a better job of hiding such things but I want to have a thigh gap or flat tummy before I wear them again.  Most of them are excessively big in the waist though so I probably wouldn't be able to find a pair that fit properly.  I like flare legs better.  I don't know why but I just do.  I did buy a purse and two headbands and some earrings though.  And diet foods of course.  Asparagus and more broccoli and more Greek yogurt and tea and Slim Fast shake powder.  The powder was cheaper so I figured i would go with that.  It has more calories than the already made stuff but I figured I could just drink half a serving at a time.  I wanted some protein drink powder but it was kind of expensive.  The container is big but I didn't want to pay $20+ on it.  It would be too hard to hide anyway.  Maybe when I get a job and D gets an apartment I can keep it there.  D wants to get an apartment and stay in it like every other weekend.  Probably be cheaper than 4 nights at a hotel every month.  Part of me wants to work things out with D and the other part just wants to end the relationship.  A divorce in Illinois has a 180 like waiting period or whatever you want to call it.  So I'm just not sure.  So this is kind of jumpy because my mind is like going in 5 million directions and I stop typing to read a blog or look at a website or whatever.  But I plan on taking the dog for a long walk this evening.  Hopefully it will be cool enough then.  It's kind of hot right now.  I would sweat for sure and I don't think Chunky could make it very far before he would start panting and need to rest.  I was going to talk to a recruiter for the Air Force today but I kind of chickened out I guess you could say.  I know that being on antidepressants would temporarily disqualify me for 1 year and it hasn't been 1 year.  So I just don't know if I should try to join or not.  J said that he wasn't asked if he had ever been on antidepressants but his sister (who also joined the Marines) was asked about antidepressants.  So I'm not sure if I should try or not.  I think I'll go get some applications after I get paid tomorrow.  Maybe attempt to find the temp job service place.  I want to get 5 more job apps filled out by Friday.  That's like 1 a day so not bad.  I'm hoping to get a job by the end of the month.  I weighed 119 this morning after I worked out.  I washed the dishes too so I could skip breakfast easier that way.  And then I was in Iowa so if I get asked (which I haven't yet) I'll say I ate in Iowa and just make up some sort of food that I ate at a fast-food place.  Easy.  I have some cleaning that I should do.  I think I'll see if my mom wants to sort clothes and then I'll have that done.  Probably take about 30 min and it'll clear up some space in my room.  I've probably rambled enough.


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