Thursday, June 2, 2011

My weight is the same.  115.5-ish.  I ate a lot more than I should have yesterday but I exercised.  Obviously not enough to lose but just enough to not gain.  Depressed/pissed.  Pissed at my mother.  Pissed at D.  Pissed at J.  Let's not talk about it.  I don't want any comments mentioning D or J or my mother or the concerts or anything involving a job.  I feel like binging and purging mainly just to binge and purge.  My stomach was hurting last night and I'm not sure why.  Actually I have a feeling it was from eating too much after supper.  I ate like 400 cal worth of frosting and caramel sauce because I was pissed and wanted to cut but I didn't want to cut so I ended up eating.  And right now I'm hungry but my stomach is starting to hurt.  I'm eating yogurt and drinking milk.  Like 170-ish calories.  It's not too bad as long as I don't snack.  Two 200 calorie meals (breakfast and lunch) and one 400 calorie meal (supper) would be 800 calories which wouldn't be too bad so that's what I'm trying to do.  My sister didn't come home last night so I can do all the exercising I want.  I don't have to worry about being too loud and waking her up or anything.  I'm in need of some sort of high and an exercise high will hopefully work and then maybe tomorrow I can have a decent post.  I'm going to take 1 QuickTrim not and another 1 in about 3 hours.  I looked online at some reviews and a lot of people felt sick from them.  Of course those people decided to be stupid and take the 4 a day that the bottle suggests and keep taking them even thought they felt sick and ended up really sick.  Honestly I think those people were stupid to take 4 in one day when their body isn't used to it and then continue taking the full dose even though they didn't feel good.  But I guess I like self-medication.  Which probably isn't a good thing....  I can thank my ex for that.  Here take this when you're pissed and want to kill the world and take this and you will pretty much instantly sleep.  Great.  Thanks.  Nothing like getting you're underage girlfriend self-medicating.  I have the worst exes...  J was the best out of all of them.  Except I don't plan on texting J anymore.  Like I said let's not talk about it.  I don't need to end up wanting to cut again and end up eating instead.  Although I probably will just cut next time.  Like I said don't talk about it and I'll attempt to get my exercise high (because I don't remember what happened last time I tried to get high off pills but when I woke up not high I remember where I was and I don't need to be $10,000 in debt again....) and then hopefully I'll feel ok...  Alrighty then...QuickTrim and exercise.



  1. Are you seeing any positive effects from the Quicktrim?

  2. I don't think dairy is the best thing for an upset tummy. Unless they're just hunger pains, in which case, anything will be good. lol. I'm sorry to hear that QuickTrim is turning out to be a POS. I wanted to try... but now I'm just like... wtf. I hate being in pain, which probably has a lot to do with the fact I can't fast. i hope everything gets better.

    and yay for not gaining!