Saturday, August 20, 2011

Something a little different.  Kind of like a story only it's short.  Yeah...  My weight was 115 last I checked.  I think that was yesterday.  Haven't been able to keep track of calories because my mother refuses to cook.  Yesterday was just bad in general.  So I don't really feel like talking.  Maybe later.  The little girl is coming over and I work 9-2 today and tomorrow.  My mother is getting her at 10 and probably take her back at 4 tomorrow.  I was thinking about doing a little shopping today after work.  I gotta go get ready for work.  I might might post more later.  Or not.  Who knows?  I don't have time for thinspo.  I'll at least do that later.

She sits staring blankly.  Cigarette in hand.  Inhaling the chemical mixture.  Lungs tightening.  Suffocating.  She exhales with a cloud of smoke.  Blood shot eyes.  How much longer now?  One hour and twelve minutes.  She smokes the cigarette until it is gone.  She picks up another and lights it.  Just five left.  Inhale.  Lungs tighten.  Exhale.  Repeat.  Her bag is packed and ready to go.  But she's not.  She will never be ready.  Is anyone ever truly ready though?  She keeps smoking.  It calms her nerves a little.
She picks up the last cigarette.  The last one.  She wonders if she will ever get one again.  She lights it.  Inhale.  Suffocate.  Exhale.  Just twenty-three minutes.
A car pulls into the drive.  She grabs her bag and heads out the door.  Slightly shaking inside.  The anxiety is slowly taking over.  She hides it well though.  She gets in the car and they speed away to the train station.
She get out.  Just seven more minutes.
Four.  She feel the anxiety taking a hold.  She can't hide it anymore.
Two.  She hears the train pulling in.  She digs out her ticket.
She stands up and hands the man her ticket and gets on.  Just fourteen hours.  Hopefully.
The train heads out.  Moving slowly.  She sits next to a window staring out.  Anxiety has control.  Time for a pill.  She opens a bottle of water and takes a drink.  She digs out her pills.  One pill slides down her throat with the help of water.  And then one more.  She puts away the pills and water.
Her anxiety subsides.  She craves a cigarette though.  Too bad there isn't a smoke stop for another three and a half hours.
She sits staring out the window.  Darkness begins creeping in.  She curls up and goes to sleep.
She awakes in Nebraska.  Apparently the train had some electrical problems and had to wait for repairs.  Running behind schedule.  Middle of nowhere.  The train is moving though.  As fast as it can.  Two hours late.
One hour and forty-one minutes late.
Fifty-six minutes late.
Through Colorado.
Forty-eight minutes late.
She grabs her bag.  Ready to make her departure into her new world.  Her new life.
She gets off the train.  They're there waiting for her.  She walks over to them and they head out.  The get in the car and head off.
Loveland.  That's her new home.  At least for tonight.

No comments:

Post a Comment