So ive been at aas.  Aa has a job and has been training every morning this week. And he doesnt have a car but i do so my car is getting him to work. Ive been working out at the y some. I got fired from my job because of something really stupid.  My anxiety has been really high. Like all of my mental/emotional problems have been bad enough that i probably need a psych ward. Nothing looks like its getting better. I wanted to b/p one night and aa could understand that its an emotional thing for me. He kept telling me to eat a little of this and that and stop. He said it was because im starving myself. No. I would be craving one thing then and i would be ok with either a little or a healthier version. Like chocolate? If it was from being deprived fruit with a little melted chocolate or chocolate syrup would work. In a b/p situation it wont. Aa knows i have a blog but he doesnt quit understand what one is or why someone would have one. The picture? He said i could post it. Apparently he thought i meant facebook. No... But he said i could post another picture of him. I just gotta take one first. Hes also letting me eat once today. Normally he would make me eat twice. Because im supposed to take lithium twice a day. But i want on new pills. Its been kind of obvious that they arent working. So aa isnt making me take them so i can eat once today. I tried for nothing but he said a protien bar would be ok. Thats less than 200 calories so i guess it works. Im gonna go turn in some job apps and things later then hopefully go to the y to burn off those calories and then some. Anyway. I need to go feed animals and stuff. Hopefully i can catch up on some blogs tonight and tomorrow.
~Kes