It's been a bit... I dated a guy for over 2 years and we broke up and I've been busy moving and and trying to get my things and whatnot. It's been stressful and it has not been easy at all. He instantly had a new girl. But he gets super mad when he finds out I'm interested in a new guy and shit. I really like this new guy but my ex just tears me down and destroys me and calls him my fuck buddy and says all that matters to me is sex and that the guy I like only wants sex. It's horrible. I spend some days crying all day because of how mean he can be to me. My weight has been fluctuating because of the stress and my period that decided to start. Some days I barely eat because I'm just not hungry. Some days I don't realize I haven't eaten til my stomach growls. Some days I just keep shoving food into my face thinking it will somehow relieve the stress. Hopefully today will be the last day that I have to deal with my ex. I'm getting the last of my stuff and I'm getting a new phone and a new phone number. Everyone tells me to just block his number. I don't think anyone realizes that without a restraining order I can only keep his calls from ringing. They would go straight to voicemail and it'll show missed calls from him and all of his texts will still go through as normal. The guy I like now has been great. He's done a lot to keep me sane. He calmed me down with 2 texts when I wanted to cut. I don't know of anyone calming me down that quickly. I really want him to stay in my life. He means a lot to me even though I haven't known him that long. He doesn't know about blogger but he knows I've been dealing with eating issues. I even showed him pictures of my lower weights. So yeah... I really like him... But we'll see how this goes... Hopefully I'll be back soon.
~kes
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